The zombies featured in last night’s dreams were simply meandering, not really a threat to anyone initially. At some point they became very interested in a friend of mine and me as we were in the park. I couldn’t figure out what it was until I realized they wanted the bag of costume jewelry I was holding. I held it up in the air and they roared, outstretched moldy hands reaching for the bag.

“They want the jewelry?” asked my friend.

“I think they just like anything tawdry.” I shook the bag at them as they surged forward. “Let’s lead them into the farmer’s market!”

And so we took off at a run, the zirconian-loving zombies stumbling after us, eyeless sockets fixed on the bag.

I woke up before we actually reached the farmer’s market.

This is what I get for watching my absolutely adorable boyfriend in Mutant Vampire Zombies from the Hood last night. It’s the end of the world, yo!